Acting Out the Scene

 I love writing dialogue. The rhythm and flow of it. The revelations that come out between the characters.

I think part of my attraction to writing dialogue is that it can bring out the inner performer in me. When you're writing dialogue between two or more characters, you may have imbued each with some of your personality, but you really have to become them to do justice to the scene. Even when just writing a monologue, a character's distinct personality and voice must be appreciated. When I'm writing a scene between two or more people, I may know the concept of the scene and I may know the outcome I want from the conversation, but sometimes how to get to that point is a complete mystery because I'm not really sure what the characters' responses will be to each other until I'm deep into the scene. And if I force a statement to achieve the desired outcome to the scene it can often seem just that: Forced and not true to the characters.

So writing a scene between characters can become Academy Award time as I start dreaming up the dialogue by acting out the characters themselves. I've had whole arguments with myself, or rather the characters have, as I work out interactions and confrontations down to facial expressions and gestures. You can imagine how this appears to other drivers at a stop light when one character is animatedly telling another the facts of life.

I never stopped to think of how much acting can go into writing until I started writing confrontations between the brothers in my second vampire novel Ujaali. The brothers are reunited unexpectedly and each carries a good deal of baggage regarding the other. There's a deep love there, but circumstances have forced an antagonism that must be worked through. Their relationship heals, but it's slow and takes place over proceeding novels. The resentment the younger brother feels for the older brother is strong and has turned to hatred over the years, but it can't be a hatred so strong that they can never reconcile. What I hoped to instill in the dialogue between the brothers, even with all the anger and accusations, is a regret at the chasm that had built up between them. And of course it's that regret that eventually helps heal the rift. 

But they're both stubborn and angry, and dealing with each other right after their forced reunion is not going to be easy. Releasing pain and anger in a situation like that can be a long process. When writing the dialogue between them, it helped to feel that resentment along with the underlying affection and familial bond that would help bring the two brothers back together in ensuing novels. For me, acting out the scenes helped me create conversations that were much more realistic.

An excerpt from Ujaali:

Before Aziz could respond, a commotion in the room caught their attention and they turned to see Narain grab Channing by the arm and toss him into the wall. The two ran into the room just as he was bearing down on the doctor, screaming curses at him. They caught him as he had his hands around the doctor’s throat and after some effort, both Aziz and Jameson were able to pull Narain off the man and force him against the wall where they did their best to hold him. The strength in his fury astonished them and Jameson wondered if it would be necessary to get some ferals in to hold him back from killing the doctor. Realising Reg was one of those holding him back to Narain switched his anger to him, yelling, “I warned you, I would not allow you to hurt her.”

“What are you talking about?” Reg said, leaning heavily against him, doing his best to hold him back with one arm.

“Calm yourself, please, Narain,” Aziz said, “Tell us what’s wrong?”

“Look at her hand, you fool,” Narain hissed. “Her left hand!”

Risking a turn of his head, Aziz glanced at the table his sister was on. The doctor had gently placed her hand on a cloth covered tray and Aziz’s eyes grew wide when he noticed that the first digit of her pinky had been snipped off by the pair of large surgical shears that were now on the floor. The severed tip lay next to the rest of the pinky on the bloody cloth.

Gasping, Aziz shot a warning glance at Reg, though he retained a firm hold on his brother. “What has he done?”

Eyes narrowing as he viewed the pinky, Reg said, “Doctor, what exactly is the reason for this?”

Hoarsely and in great pain, Channing said, “I need to gauge the rate of her healing abilities.”

“That has nothing to do with why we’re here!” Narain screamed.

“Oh dear God, it does if the problem she has is physical,” Reg fumed.

“Look, Bhai,” Aziz tried to reassure him, “this will solve nothing. She’s asleep. She didn’t feel it.”

“You don’t understand,” Narain growled. “You don’t know these people. They’re dangerous.”

Aziz held him firm. “She isn’t hurt and we know the finger can be repaired.”

“Provided the digit isn’t lost,” said Jameson slyly.

Narain renewed his struggles and this time Aziz released his hold, allowing him to go after Reg.

Aziz watched the two struggle, losing his patience. If Narain would settle down for a moment, Aziz could perhaps think straight. Were there any designs upon hurting any of them Jameson’s people certainly had ample opportunities to do so. Even his brother’s vigilance wouldn’t have been enough if Channing had decided to use a sedative on him. It certainly wasn’t enough to keep him from maiming Ujaali. But it wasn’t permanent. They all knew that. And Channing’s reasoning for what he did made a certain amount of sense.

“Listen to me Narain,” Aziz said, grabbing his brother and holding him off Reg. “Listen. You know she’s not seriously hurt. You know the pinky can be re-attached. It will be fine. But he needs to see how she heals. He needs to understand her completely.”

“And besides, she has nine other fingers,” Reg sniped.

Furious, Narain broke free from their grasp and lunged not for Jameson, but for Dr. Channing, pulling him to the floor and preparing to go for his throat. Shocked by the violence, Aziz found his own anger and kicked his brother sharply off the man, sending him skidding across the floor. When Narain regained his foot and prepared to attack again, Aziz lashed out and punched him hard across the cheek. When his brother rose again, he smacked him once more, leaving Narain kneeling on the floor rubbing his jaw, the fight evaporating.

Rounding on Reg and the doctor, he said, “We’re going out to cool off.” He grabbed Narain by the shoulder and pulled him up.

“I said one of us stays here at all times,” Narain insisted, swaying a bit.

“We’ll make an exception this time.” To the other two, Aziz said, “You fix her finger and fix it right and if anything else happens to her, you’ll have the two of us to deal with.”

All but shoving Narain out of the room, Aziz followed close behind making sure his brother didn’t take the chance to run back into the exam room. Even in their worst battles of the past few weeks, he hadn’t seen Narain this worked up and it unnerved Aziz. Narain was supposed to be the level headed one; the older brother. The more experienced of the two vampires. This was not just anger fuelling his passion. Indeed it was also fear, though fear of what Aziz couldn’t tell.

Once outside even the crisp night air did little to cool Narain’s ire. He paced in front of his brother, his gaze glued to the ground as if furiously trying to work out a problem with an answer that remained just beyond his grasp.

“Aziz,” he growled low, “you don’t know what you’re doing.”

“You need to calm down,” Aziz told him, making sure he was in easy reach of the door should his brother bolt.

“You don’t know what these people are capable of! We need to get her out of there. I made a mistake.”

“No Narain, she stays here.”

“What are you saying?” Narain demanded, gesturing. “We can’t stay here. You don’t understand. You don’t know…”

“These people?” Aziz finished, shouting over his brother. “No, Narain, I don’t know these people. Nor do I really know you.” Narain was silent, a stricken look crossing his face and Aziz said, “Yes, they cut off her finger. Gruesome but we all know not permanent. Weren’t you the one, however, who suggested we kill her? Just a few moments ago you nearly tore the throat from a normal man who would never be strong enough to fight back. Tell me, Narain, who should I be more concerned about trusting?”

The desperate need to retort was written all over his brother’s face but Narain had nothing to respond with. All the brothers had done since reuniting was to show each other hostility. The reunion had been forced upon them and the only thing uniting them was the shared desire to help Ujaali. Narain was almost as much a stranger to Aziz as Jameson was and Reg had shown the younger brother a darn site more respect than Aziz’s own brother had.

With some of the fight drained from him, Narain stood still, slowly rubbing his face, his only response being a repeat of, “I made a mistake. I should never have brought either of you here. I should never have involved him. We need to take Ujaali and leave.”

“No, Narain.”

“We’ll take her back to my condo. We’ll figure something out.”

“No, we won’t Narain.”

“Aziz, we must!”

“She stays Narain.”

“Dear God, Aziz! Why would you want her to stay here?”

“Because I want my sister back!” Aziz’s shout echoed across the empty fields, forcing Narain to take a step back. Letting his own frustration grip him, Aziz leaned forward, gesturing between the two of them, saying, “You and I don’t know what to do for her. We tried but we just don’t know.” Pausing, he fought back tears. “You…you didn’t know her, Narain. You knew our sweet five year old sister but you didn’t know the grand lady she became. If I have any pity for you it’s that you missed out on that. She was my friend, Narain. My confidant. My connection to Ma and Baba and Zaheer. She loved me despite of what I became. I don’t care what monstrous thing they’ve supposedly done to you or you’ve done to them. These people might be able to

help her. As long as they don’t kill her, and that would be pretty hard to do, I’m willing to give them some room to work.”

Breathing heavily, Narain asked, “And if they should kill her?”

Aziz raised his hands. “What’s the alternative, brother? I suppose it’ll leave one less task for you to carry out.”

For a moment, Narain looked as though he had just been punched in the gut. Then, a hard look came over his face and his jaw set firmly. Coldly, he said, “I have given Jameson’s people one month. If Ujaali doesn’t show signs of definite improvement within that time, no one, blood or otherwise, will keep me from taking her away from this place.”

Not another word was spoken as Narain stalked back into the barn, leaving Aziz alone with his regrets outside.

 

When Aziz responded with, "I want my sister back!" I felt the anguish he experiencing. And when he told Narain, "You didn't know the grand lady she'd become" I could feel the power of Narain's guilt which he'd been carrying for decades.

Yet Aziz couldn't resist getting a lick in when Narain's suggestion that they might kill her prompts Aziz to state, "I suppose it'll leave one less task for you to carry out."

This remains one of my favorite confrontations in the novel.

Of course this works well with humor also. I like to mix a little humor into my novels, no matter how serious the plot. I've found that in life humor can wriggle its way into even the darkest of times. If you can act out how characters might interact with eachother, you can flavor the writing with humor that comes off natural to the reader. But again, you have to understand your characters. Sure it's a great comeback and perfect for the scene, but would Character A really be the type to say something like that? Yet you can't really attribute it to Character B cause it doesn't fit him either. You might need to give up the comeback altogether. 

Excerpt from Ujaali:

Ujaali had regained consciousness slowly, but once she was awake, she was very much awake. She knew Narain, but didn’t really know what to make of him. So she alternated between pulling him close for a hug and pushing him away when the hug lasted longer than her limited patience allowed. Aziz, having experienced Ujaali’s frame of mind for some time now, spoke to her carefully, as if speaking to a child, yet being completely honest when he explained what happened the night before. Narain wasn’t sure how much she actually understood. There were moments when she seemed to be going more by Aziz’s tone as she stared at him, than by the words he spoke. He was incredibly patient with her, however. Indeed over the years they had forged a special bond that stood them in good stead during this current crisis. Narain couldn’t help but be grateful that this bond managed to keep her as calm as possible for the energy coursing through her fairly radiated from her.

They’d moved the party from the spare bedroom out into the living room where Narain offered his sister some of the blood he’d gotten from Cassie the night before. She grabbed it without hesitation and bit into the plastic, unconcerned with any dribbling that came from it. She then scurried under the dining room table where she could enjoy her prize in peace. Narain had been amazed to see that his sister had her vampire teeth. His had taken weeks to come in as his dental anatomy took time to alter. The teeth, the strength, the durability. It was not an immediate process normally, yet with Ujaali, it had been very quick indeed.

Aziz’s repeated whine scattered Narain’s thoughts and he snapped, “I’m thinking, Aziz.”

“You’ve been thinking all day.”

Defensively, Narain pointed to her saying, “It’s taken us all day to get her out from under the dining room table. This is actually an improvement.”

“Yes, if she lived in a kennel.”

“Aziz!”

“Narain!”

Narain was about to reply when he noticed Aziz pointing at Ujaali. He turned to her and saw her staring intently at them, the bag of blood half finished before her mouth. As if taking on the role of a peacemaker, she blinked a few times, first offering the blood toward Narain, then maneuvering it to indicate an offer to Aziz.

“You see,” Aziz said, slowly taking a seat next to Narain on the sofa. “She can connect sometimes. She doesn’t like to see us fight.”

“Then she’ll be a very disappointed young woman,” Narain said reaching out his hand to the bag to indicate that the blood was for her. Scrutinizing her as he had for the past several hours, he said, “I suppose there must be something firing though.”

“She remembered you immediately,” Aziz told him. “And actually forgave you for stabbing her.”

“Aziz!” Narain spat. Ujaali held the blood forward again and Narain smiled, raising a finger to his lips. “You do that every time I get angry at Aziz and you’ll starve.”

Aziz was right though, she did seem to sense some sort of kinship with both of them. It was her unpredictability that they found difficult to deal with. Perhaps it truly was only a matter of retraining her. Aziz and he, with the sun trapping them inside, could find a number of things to keep them busy for their minds were clear. Arguing seemed to be their top distraction. Ujaali, half mad with whatever tormented her, had very few options to keep her highly-strung personality busy. Narain was beginning to understand the attitude of ferals. Their choices were limited to prowling, eating or hibernating by their mental abilities.

Rising slowly, he held out his hands to calm her newly agitated state. “It’s alright, sweetheart,” he said softly. Narain looked at Aziz and indicated that he should remain seated. Meanwhile, he carefully and quickly took the bag from her and before she could protest, he put a hand on her back, coaxing her from the chair. “Ujaali, I watched Ma train you as a child. I hope it works again.”

“What are you doing?” Aziz said curiously.

Softly, Narain explained as he seated his sister at the dining table, “If we can reach her, we may be able help her mind connect to old skills.” He looked up at Aziz. “Civilise her as you would a two-year-old.”

“I’ve known very few civilized two-year-olds,” Aziz said, and chuckled at Narain’s grin.

Motioning with his hands, Narain said, “Now stay there darling until I come back,” keeping the blood visible to her intent gaze.

Grabbing a mug from the counter, he placed it in front of his sister, then poured the blood in it. Ujaali stared at it, confused. She knew the container held blood. The things she’d been given to ease her hunger since awakening were at least soft and pliable, her teeth piercing the bags easily. But this object was cold and hard. Ujaali stared at it, then up at Narain, then back at the mug. Indicating that she should pay attention, Narain took the mug and raised it to his lips then lowered it, a coating of the blood still on his lips. He ached to drain the mug but he held back, instead making a show of licking his lips, hoping that Ujaali would understand where the blood came from. If she could not grasp the connection, he feared it could be possible that her reasoning skills were damaged. Still, one test wasn’t proof positive.

Blinking, she touched his lips, and stared into the mug. Her teeth showing, she lowered her face to it and bit the side, chipping off a huge chunk then spitting it out furiously when no blood issued forth. The chunk clattered across the table and before Narain could get it, Ujaali snatched hold of it, hissing and lashing out, slicing open his forehead.

Jumping to his feet, he grabbed his bleeding head, shouting, “God damnit, Ujaali!”

“Narain!”

“She cut me, Aziz!”

“Narain, shut up and look at her.”

Wiping at the remnant of blood from the fresh but no longer bleeding cut, he sat back down and looked at her. Blinking Ujaali stared at Narain’s face, still holding the chunk, her arm outstretched as if she was so fascinated by the healing cut that she forgot to lower it. She reached out, brushing back his hair from his forehead and lightly trailing her finger down the inch and a half scar. She looked at the blood on her fingers that she’d wiped from his forehead, then licked it, her brows furrowing.

Could she tell the difference between normal and infected blood? he thought. He could now and physically she had developed much more quickly.

Getting an idea, Narain grabbed the chunk from her hand, and used it to slash her arm. The violence against his sister turned his stomach but he felt it necessary to test his theory. Ujaali hissed at him, but he held her arm for her to watch the cut seal up and heal. With the amount of blood she’d been feasting upon her system was much more efficient than his and the scar was already disappearing. Cocking her head she touched it, then turned her attention again to the cut on his forehead which now looked to be a scar a few years old.

Eyes wide, Narain smiled, glancing sideways at Aziz. “She’s getting it, Aziz. She’s reasoning out the connection.” He bared his teeth showing her the fangs normally concealed behind his canine teeth and her eyes widened as she followed suit.

Taking her hand, she led him from the table and over to Aziz and without saying a word, he lashed out with the ceramic shard, connecting with his brother’s cheek.

Aziz grabbed at his cheek. “Narain are you mad!”

But Narain pulled his brother’s hand away so Ujaali could get a look at Aziz’s healing cheek. Kneeling before Aziz, she watched, fascinated, then reached up and shoved her fingers into his mouth.

As Narain laughed triumphantly Aziz brushed her hand away, mumbling. “Okay, okay, hold on.” Then he bared his teeth and the fangs emerged.

Grunting, she smiled and indicated that Narain should look. “Yes, sweetheart. Sadly he’s related to us.”

She touched Aziz’s nearly sealed scar, then Narain’s nearly healed forehead and then her now flawless arm. Then she crawled from the sofa and stood up, walking over to the mug and studying it. She reached two fingers into it then pulled them out, tasting the blood on her fingers. Then she looked at Narain before turning

the mug and taking a drink from the side still intact. Blood still dribbled down her chin and Narain noticed another large rust stain forming on his rug but he was so grateful at the sight that the loss of his rug didn’t matter.

“There may be hope,” he told Aziz as they both watched her. “Do you see that?”

Aziz glanced down at the drops of blood that fell on his sleeve. “All I can see is my need for a new shirt.”

“She’s able to reason,” Narain said, still grinning. “Not only that, she enjoys the discovery. Your average feral wouldn’t care about anything which doesn’t involve feeding. Not only is she capable of learning, she may very well want to. We may have a chance at getting our sister back.”

Aziz chuckled with a small sense of relief and walked over to Ujaali, taking a napkin to wipe her chin. She smiled up at him, then grabbed the napkin and shoved him away violently. Good naturedly, he looked at Narain and said, “We may have to start with curbing the attitude.”

Narain merely grinned, watching the interaction, grateful for some hope brightening what had been a very dark time. They were not out of the woods yet. He had no way of gauging how far Ujaali would progress. The thought that this one-time bright woman, wife, and mother of six, might now have only an infantile mental capacity concerned him but even that would be better than her being the mindless killer he had feared she was. Anything was better than a feral.

 

I had a great deal of fun writing scenes like this between the brothers. The tension is there between them, but there's also a great deal of love (though of course at that point neither would admit it).

So putting on your performers hat during the writing process can help you get inside the characters and result in more realistic dialogue.

Next time you see someone at the stop light talking to themselves and gestilucating wildy, you might just be watching someone writing their next novel.